Trouble Follows Wallace to Neptune! Plus the ABCs of Sweeps

You know, there really isn't enough cleverness in the world. If you think about it, very few shows consistently present clever writing, so when they do, we greatly appreciate it. Think about the incredible creative genius that is this season's Scrubs and of course, the always clever Veronica Mars. I imagine that if the two shows were ever to meet up, it would be the world's largest Clever-fest, jam packed with the world's best one-liners. The writing teams behind both shows are severely underrated as are the brilliant actors who breath such perfect life into these incredibly clever lines. Take last night's episode of Veronica Mars, there were so many excellent one-liners that I could barely keep up. Two of my favorites (paraphrasing here... Weevil's "Church, right. The only place where the Spics and the Mcs get together without throwing a punch" and Veronica's "I have the perfect pantomime horse costume. Do either of you have any experience being a horse's ass?") still make me laugh. But Veronica isn't just clever when it comes to the quick dialog, the show is also extremely clever with its storytelling. I once again was caught off guard when they revealed the surprise of the episode - Jackie and Veronica working together to clear Wallace's name. It worked because they kept Jackie's performance at the frat party completely in character, but at the same time, they allowed her to develop somewhat as we saw a softer side to her. It was a well-played twist, but it's a rare occasion when this show doesn't remind us that it is smarter and more clever than most.

Last night's episode also served to further the bus crash plot. I loved Keith's tape-stealing plot in the beginning. From the tapes, we learned that all of the 09ers got off the bus because of the horrid smell (most likely the dead rat) and they all had parents who had their cars serviced by Curly Moran, the dead guy who washed up on shore with Veronica's name on his hand. It does seem that someone wanted to get all the rich kids off the bus, including possibly Veronica since she was dating 09er Duncan. There was also the development that Weevil was caught on cell phone video tape beating up Curly. Did this beating lead to Curly's death? And if so, why would Weevil want him dead? It seems that Weevil is in a lot of trouble considering he lost control of his gang and his motorcycle. And then there was Jackie's father, who we saw getting taken away in cuffs at the end of the show for his suspected involvement in the bus crash. What could he possibly have to do with the crash? Very interesting. One last Veronica-related note, creator/executive producer Rob Thomas tells TV Guide in its latest issue that Duncan is done. He says that the Logan-Veronica-Duncan storyline has run its course saying, "I think in an attempt to keep the show fresh, there is going to need to be other guys in her life." So, I stand corrected about my assessment of Teddy Dunn's continued role on the show. He was, however, still in the last night's opening credits and he still has one last episode in his contract, so it's not entirely out of the realm of possibility that we may see him again. If you're interested in hearing more from Thomas, click on over to TV Guide.com's Insider column where he discusses those mysterious fortune cookie numbers, the future of Veronica and Logan, and what really happened between Duncan and Kendall.

In my continuing series on what the networks are planning for this sweeps month, we take a look at ABC. As usual, I will do my best to keep the following spoiler free, but be warned that there may be minor spoilers ahead. All dates are subject to change.

Grey's Anatomy- This show gets the prime post-Superbowl spot this Sunday with special guest stars Christina Ricci and Kyle Chandler. ABC is not releasing much about the episode, but some reports have hinted that a life threatening situation enters the hospital and puts everyone at risk. The situation continues on the February 12th episode also featuring Ricci and Chandler. The following week, someone from Derek and Addison's past arrives and shakes things up.

Boston Legal - Michael J. Fox and Betty White continue their arcs on this show. In the February 7th episode, Fox's terminal character hosts his own funeral. In the February 14th episode, Alan Shore sues a private school that won't admit a gifted student because nerve damage prevents her from smiling. Tom Selleck guest stars in the February 21st episode. And the February 28th episode finds Denny Crane caught with another woman.

Lost - Returns February 8th with fears that The Others are back after a failed kidnapping attempt and Sawyer watches as tensions rise between Jack, Locke, Kate and Ana Lucia. On February 15th, Rousseau returns and leads Sayid to an interesting captive in the jungle while Sawyer learns about another survivor's breech of trust, which leads to blackmail.

Invasion - Russell, Larkin and Dave are all in shock to learn about the mysterious creature lurking around the Varon home on February 8th. On February 15th, Kira finds herself in danger after she sets out to find the truth about Homestead.

Desperate Housewives - Tom attempts to bond with his new boss and Bree goes snooping around the Applewhite house on February 12th. On February 19th, Maria Conchita Alonso guest stars as Gabby's mother.

Other sweeps notes for ABC - Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone airs this Saturday (Feb. 4th), Super Bowl XL: Pittsburgh Steelers v. Seattle Seahawks airs this Sunday (Feb. 5th), A Charlie Brown Valentine airs on Valentine's Day (Feb. 14th), The Bachelor wraps up another season with the final rose ceremony (Feb. 27th) and Barbara Walters hosts her annual Oscar special (March 1st). For more on ABC's sweeps plans, click on over to The Futon Critic.

About Last Night... Fox won the first hour of the night with American Idol, followed by NBC's E-Ring and CBS comedies Yes Dear and Still Standing. A 9, CBS landed in first with a repeat of Criminal Minds, followed by Fox's Bones and ABC's Lost (r). UPN's Veronica Mars landed in fifth for the second week in a row thanks to its lifeless lead-in South Beach. The final hour of the night went to CBS's CSI: NY, followed by NBC's Law & Order (r) and ABC's Invasion (r). For more on last night's ratings, visit Zap2it.

~Primetime Pass~ (NOTE: Tonight marks the beginning of February Sweeps)
@8 p.m. - The 12th season of Survivor kicks off on CBS, and this time, the castaways are divided into four teams based on age and sex and one castaway will be sent to Exile Island each week. Over on ABC, Dancing with the Stars continues with the remaining six teams competing in the samba. UPN's Everybody Hates Chris tackles school picture day with hilarious results.

@9 p.m. - CBS's CSI shows us a different perspective as we view the crime through the eyes of the killer. Over on NBC, Adam Goldberg guest stars on My Name is Earl as Earl tries to redeem himself for stealing gas out of other people's cars. Fox's The O.C. finds Marissa telling Johnny how she really feels.

@10 p.m. - CBS takes us to Tokyo (and if you've seen the gazillions ads, then you know this one was filmed on location) to search for a missing former Marine accused of raping a young girl on Without a Trace. Gilmore Girls' Keiko Agena guest stars. Over on NBC, James Woods and Ally Walker guest star on ER. Woods plays an ALS patient.


QUICK CUTS

*The benching continues today as ABC announced that Invasion will take a six-week hiatus starting March 22nd. During that time, the network will try out the new John Wells crime show Evidence. Also announced for midseason were Miracle Workers (March 6th), What About Brian (April 2nd), the return of Supernanny (March 6th) and the Simon Cowell produced American Inventor (March 16th). Notably missing from the list is Alias, which was slated to return this Spring to finish out its final season. No word yet from ABC on when to expect its return.

*And finally, a follow up to a stunt-tastic story you read here earlier this week. Pop diva Britney Spears' upcoming appearance on NBC's Will & Grace will air in April. In the episode, she'll play a Christian conservative sidekick to Jack (Sean Hayes), whose Out TV is bought by a Christian network. Spears' character will contribute a cooking segment on Jack's talk show as part of the takeover. The episode is scheduled to air April 13th on NBC.

That's all for today. Be sure to tune in tomorrow for thoughts on CSI (How will an episode through the killer's eyes work?) and Without a Trace (Filmed! On! Location in Tokyo!) and a look at the WB's sweeps plans. Plus, all the latest television news.


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