'Race' Takes the Plunge! Plus the Scrubies and Nielsen Wednesday

It's only week two of The Amazing Race and already partnerships are forming. How unlikely of a pair are the pretty boys from Florida and the hippies from California? What I'm finding most interesting is the fact that none of the teams seems to hate any of the others - yet. It seems to me that the hate usually starts right out of the gate, but everyone is getting along so far. You know I totally just spoke too soon and now we're going to see major fighting next week! I'm still strongly disliking Lake. I think the main thing that bugs me about him is the way he is so controlling and demeaning. It says a lot to me when Michelle says that doing the Race will give her an opportunity to show to herself and LAKE that she is capable of doing it. Shouldn't her husband already know this? Ugh, he's just so degrading! Moving on, the teams all left the pit stop and headed to Edificio Copan where they had to find Blanco F to get their next clue. After a mad taxi-dash to the location, all of the teams learned that Blanco F didn't open to 8 a.m. One noteworthy event during this taxi-dash was Michelle's comment that Lake "is definitely the typical Type A personality." Now, we all know what she meant, but it seems more likely to me that he is a different "Type A" personality, the kind that begins with an" A" and ends with an "SS."

Once again moving on. Once the location opened for business, teams learned that they would be facing their first Roadblock of the Race. One team member had to climb up the fire escape of Edificio Copan and rappel 400 feet down the side of the building. The rappelling order would be decided by the order in which each team member reached the top of the fire escape. There were three fire escapes to choose from, but somehow most of the teams felt the need to all compete for the first one. A few more climbed the second one, and only BJ and Tyler (team Hippies) chose the third. Most of the teams easily completed the task. And then there was poor Danielle (team "Double Ds") who suddenly realized that she has a huge fear of heights. Problem is that she didn't remember until she was on the top of the building about to take her turn and rappel down, and thus, our first breakdown of the new season commenced. Tears were flowing, but luckily Fran stepped in and coaxed her down. See, I told you the teams are all getting along beautifully! Of course, Fran may have been so helpful because she was concerned about the fact that Danielle's breakdown was holding her up since she still had to take her turn after Danielle, but I'm choosing to see it the other way. After completing the task, the teams had to make their way to the bus station and rip off a departure time (10:15 a.m., 11:15 a.m. or 12:15 p.m.) to travel to Brotas, Brazil. BJ/Tyler, Monica/Joseph (team "MoJo") and Eric/Jeremy (team Slacker - as I told you last week, this is what I will be calling them) snagged the earliest departure time, while the other teams had to settle for the later ones.

Once in Brotas, teams had to take one of the marked VW Bugs with a clue on its windshield. Insert your own hippie jokes here. The clue held a Detour - Press it or Climb it. In Press it, teams had to travel to an old plantation and press 15 stalks of sugar cane to release the liquid inside. Once they had pressed all 15 stalks, they had to take the liquid to something that resembled a high school chemistry set and turn the liquid into ethanol (a popular form of fuel in Brazil), and then pour the ethanol into their VW Bugs (again, insert your own hippie jokes here). In Climb it, teams had to travel to Usina Jacare where they would hike in to a waterfall and then perform a 90-foot rope climb up the falls. The three teams on the first bus decided to work together to find the waterfall. Once there, all three teams easily completed the task and learned that they would need to dive 20 miles through the country to find the next Pit Stop. The race was on for first place with BJ and Tyler getting a local to take them to the Pit Stop location. Team Slacker followed, but got concerned when the trip seemed to be taking too long. They pulled off at a gas station only to learn that they were 1 kilometer from the location, so BJ and Tyler (who had pressed on) landed in first with Team Slacker not far behind. Monica's stress issues reared their ugly head again (breathe Mo, breathe), but she was happy to finish in third. Back at the Detours, David/Lori and Wanda/Desiree both chose to Press it, and both teams easily completed the task. Things were a little different at the waterfall as Fran struggled to ascend the falls. After watching Michelle go up rather easily, Fran got the hang of it and, she too, made her way up the waterfall. Danielle/Dani seemed to also easily complete it, and all three teams were on their way to the Pit Stop. Fran and Barry ran into some bad luck when their VW Bug's battery died and stranded them on the side of the road. They were given a replacement car, but no time credit, so they headed to the Pit Stop believing they were in last place. That was because they didn't know about sisters Lisa and Joni's bad day. After getting lost, the sisters finally made their way to Press it. They struggled a little bit with the task, and wound up in last place, and thus, were eliminated from the race. Is it just me, or are the producers just screwing with Phil now? There are four teams who have at least one member whose first name ends in an "A." This, of course, sets up Phil's infamous replacing the "A" with an "ER" on the end of the name. Instead of Wanda and Desiree, we get "Wander and Desiree." I don't care how many seasons there have been, this is still awesome!

How sad was it to only get one dose of Scrubs last night? I've gotten so used to see back-to-back new episodes every week that I have been spoiled! Even though we got only half the new episodes, that didn't mean half the laughs. Who knew that Sacred Heart had a beach on its roof? Or more accurately, that it COULD have beach on its roof? And what do you do with all the sand once it starts seeping, make that pouring, into Ted's office? Build a sand castle in the parking lot, of course! I love Janitor. If you want to go to a real beach, why not start the Dorian-Cox Clinic in Jacksonville, Florida? It comes complete with two big-hearted doctors who linger a little too long in the denial stage of the 5 Stages of Grief. And then there was Dr. Kelso versus Ted. That stand-off was hysterical, and I loved how Ted the lawyer settled for 7 Sunday afternoons off. This show is just too awesome for words, so I'll go ahead and let it speak for itself with this week's look at the funniest, most inventive and all around awesome quotes.

The Scrubies
"Would you like a virgin daiquiri? It's a regular daiquiri. I just have him give it to you." Dr. Cox (referring to JD) to his terminally ill patient on the rooftop beach

"Oh good. The piles are getting smaller." Ted after coughing up another pile of sand

"Looks like rain. That could be a problem." Janitor while standing on his sand castle

"Ted, the only thing I hate more than bikes are procedural cop shows. We get it. The pedophile did it." Dr. Kelso after learning that Ted wanted the weekend off for a charity bike ride

"It's not denial. She could rally!" Dr. Cox to grief counselor Lester Hedrick (guest star Dave Foley) regarding his terminally ill patient

"Oh for the love of God! What is this? Some pansy-get-in-touch-with-my-feelings-because-my-mommy-didn't-love-me group?" Dr. Cox to Hedrick's support group

"What do you think he's dying from? A case of the handsomes?" JD after noticing one of the members of the support group (which we find out is for terminally ill people)

"I know. They hear what they want to hear." Turk to Keith regarding women

And now the night's best delivered (and longest) quote:

"You couldn't push my buttons if you tried. In fact, I have no buttons. Please think of me as button-less -- all smooth like GI Joe's nether regions. And by the by, this message is brought to you by my son Jack, who has been yanking the pants off his toy soldiers and leaving them in provocative positions on my nightstand. It is just disturbing enough, so that leaving the house, I'm cranky and less able to suffer fools, which brings me back to you - the fool. So, go now. Go before you can write a book entitled Help, a Large Doctor is Beating My Ass colon The Lester Hedrick Story." Dr. Cox to grief counselor Hedrick

What did you think about last night's episode of Scrubs? What about The Amazing Race? Be sure to drop me a comment with your thoughts. Also, if you have a quote that you would like to nominate for a Scrubie, leave me a comment and I'll publish it in a future edition.

About Last Night...Fox won the first hour of the night with American idol, followed by CBS' NCIS and two episodes of ABC's According to Jim. The real story of the hour was the poor showing for the return of NBC's Joey, which only managed to garner 3.95 million viewers and a fourth place finish. At 9, Fox stayed in the lead with House, followed by the premiere of CBS' The Unit and ABC's new comedy Sons and Daughters (back-to-back episodes). NBC's Scrubs landed in fourth. The final hour of the night went to ABC's Boston Legal, followed by NBC's Law & Order: SVU (r) and CBS' The Amazing Race. For more on last night's ratings, visit Zap2it.

~Primetime Pass~
@8 p.m. - The 8 remaining men take the stage tonight on Fox's American Idol. Over on UPN America's Next Top Model kicks off its 6th cycle with a special 2-hour episode that includes a shocking requirement for the first photoshoot.

@9 p.m. - Brennan and Zack are called to the crash site of a small jet carrying Chinese diplomats and one mystery female passenger on Fox's Bones.

@10 p.m. - Russell and Underlay must team together to catch hybrids Derek and a pregnant Christina on ABC's Invasion. Over on NBC, the detectives investigate the death of a banking associate. CBS' CSI: NY look into who murdered a doorman when the body is found in a water tank.



QUICK CUTS

*Fans of Sci Fi channels Battlestar Gallactica will have to wait until October to see the third season. The network announced today that the popular show will begin production in April, with the entire ensemble returning, on the 20-episode season. The show's second season wraps up this Friday with a special 90-minute finale on Sci Fi.

*And finally, it's Nielsen Wednesday! Fox won both the total viewers crown and the 18-49 year old one with its ratings juggernaut American Idol, which finished 2nd, 3rd and 5th for the week. Rounding out the top 10 was ABC's broadcast of the Academy Awards (#1), CSI (#4), Without a Trace (#6), CSI: Miami (#7), Two and a Half Men (tie #8), Oscar Countdown (tie #8) and Lost (#10). To see the list of the top 20 shows last week, click on over to USA Today.

That's all for today. Be sure to tune in tomorrow for my interviews with Veronica Mars' Kristen Bell (including her thoughts on that Maxim shoot) and Jason Dohring (I asked him about another Pass the Remote favorite show that he guest starred on. Can you guess which one?) Plus, all the latest television news!

*The Amazing Race picture from cbs.com


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